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Ask Dr. Sharon

Compliant Victimization

Watch this video to learn about how offenders manipulate and "groom" children and how to protect your child from victimization.

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quoteOnline predators are willing to spend however long it takes to entice your child to comply with their wishes and possibly even leave your home to meet with them in person. Many predators use the guise of understanding and romance to entice your child into what may result in a kidnapping or abduction, a sexual assault, pornography production of a minor, or even worse. quote

Key Points

key
  • Online offenders are manipulative, cunning, and very patient con artists. They understand the wants and needs of teens such as attention, affection, and companionship. They “groom” your child to trust and believe in them.
  • Online grooming entails gifts, such as cell phones with cameras, webcams, money, mp3 players, trips, or anything that teens may want but can’t afford. Many of these gifts and devices are for the purpose of encouraging teens to take, produce, and transmit sexually explicit images of themselves.
  • Research has revealed that the outcome of an offline meeting will almost always be a sexual encounter.
  • Adults have a different knowledge and powerbase than children. The law states clearly that minors are incapable of consenting to sexual contact. Therefore, no matter how complacent the minor appears regarding the sexual contact, consent of the minor is no defense for sexual contact with the adult. It is always illegal to have sexual contact with a minor.

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Parent Action Steps

parents
  • If you notice your teen is receiving gifts that you have not purchased, find out where they are coming from and contact local law enforcement if you feel your teen is in immediate danger. The CyberTipline handles leads from individuals reporting the sexual exploitation of children. You can make a report to the CyberTipline at www.cybertipline.com or by calling 1.800.THE.LOST.
  • A study commissioned by Cox Communications and NCMEC found that 14% of teens surveyed have actually met in person with someone they met on the Internet. The survey also found that parents who talk to their teens about Internet safety help reduce their teen’s exposure to potential threats and encourage their teen to make safer choices online.
  • Watch real-life stories told by teens who have been victims of Internet exploitation and use the corresponding activity cards for discussions with your teens about the possible consequences of their online actions. Hear the true story of a 13-year-old girl named Amy who left home to meet in person with a man she first “met” online. Also, meet Julie, who left home when she was 13 years old with a convicted murderer she developed a relationship with online.
  • House pledges or acceptable-use policies can help provide clear guidelines for safer Internet use. NetSmartz recommends using the Internet safety pledge to promote safety discussions and create safer boundaries. Posted near the computer, the pledge will serve as a reminder to children and teens of how to be safer when using the Internet. Keep in mind that ongoing discussion and monitoring is key.
  • Educate yourself by learning Internet definitions.

    • Resources: Congressional Testimony about “Internet Pornography”